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Saturday, May 8, 2010

The Show off...



Mom called up
"babu baari kobe aashbi."
"maa. dis time m not willing to go jabalpur. m goin bilaspur."
meantime rishi turns up, kickin my door. his usual way
"wiloopt praani, kya kar rhe ho?"
"abe, magazine kab aa rhi h"
Magazine. yaa. its named sushrut. d mgims students magazine. dis time dey highlited 06'batch as d guinea pig batch. World thinks dis batch gone crazy. Why not? After all its 06 factor. 6. its number of d beast.666. d satanic number. so there had to b something different about dis batch. d biggest fights & politics d college had ever seen.d batch was already flushed into 3groups. This is d story of one group in which i was.
&why i m so excited about d magazine is just bcoz of my article in it. conspiracy theories. it was a debatable one. my article. 1st i write Taj Mahal not built by shah jahan, its by rajputs. d damn topic gets censored. even though, earlier i was gonna write Gandhiji killed by Hindu mahasabha& britishers. surely i would hav been resticated alongwit d editor if we had done so. &wats good wit dis 1either. my Pan cake theory couldn't b printed. i ask mohit. fucker mohit.
"ha ha ha. tera to kaam ho gaya. tera pancake theory hi nhi chapa"
"kyon? kya hua?"
"usne tera article kaat diya"
"who???"
"ankita. aur kaun?"
wat d hell. i had to approach rishi to know actual fact. d fact was dat my article was too long& dey wanted to put up a pic alongwit d article. so no space. however apollo landing hoax, pyramids& no.11 got in. there was no point in heating up head accusing d girl. already i was angry wit her bcoz of d drama involvin her &amp anurag. she wants 2walk wit him on d ramp without lettin me know. &if also i know den don't let any1 else know.
"it wil b a surprise" -ankita.
wat hell bullshit surprise. already was facing mind boggling surprises. prabhakar ballamwar fightin for anita, yogi wants aanchal& aanchal want guy of her choice, every1 got problem wit prabhakar, bagga wants2 land straight on ramp, kamlesh breakin his hand, supratim fightin wit pritam for bare chest, dhoti problem- rishi wants2 wear it but doesn't know how 2wear it, azhar has2 wear it but doesn't want to, ankur wants a fair girl. my bare chest contenders sometimes crossed 14 & sometimes down to just 3.

d bridals. every nite carry speakers laptop to bio chem dept alongwit nupur &play d song 'o re piya' &watch jaya walk in. its 11:30pm. i did 3hrs gym 1hr swimmin, had dinner, feeling sleepy. at such time u got 2watch dis crackhead walk. felt like pick up d speakers &throw dem on her face &say- "teri bhains ki taang. ab mai batata hoon ramp pe kaise chalte hai". den comes ankita, wit her big beautiful eyes, smilin dancin all her way
i thought she would either ask for How I Met Ur Mother episodes or tel somethin about her anurag
"hi arnab. arnab, u know..."
& every damn thing is out. all secrets revealed. rite from which girl smellin foul to girl fights. nikita trying to shut up her. but no. another crackhead. nikita. some guys in boys hostel got crush on her madly. my friend tops d list. it won't b suitable to name him here. God knows how. why? bcoz i had fight wit dis nuisance girl. not once, twice. all i told her was she wasn't lookin good in her outfit. she got d looks. she could hav looked better. &i got fired for sayin dat. no. never fight wit girls. who knows wat happens when. u can't control ur anger& u end up bashing her up nicely& she goes out complainin -dis guy tried to rape me.
looks funny. very much apparent.
i guess dats wat mohit amit rathod always tried to tell me- dis girls aren't good. stay away.
& why should i? i got dis chance to work wit dem. dat was how i became fashion show incharge. i had no idea of dressing, formations. even in 05 gathering, i ended screwing up. kawalkar forfeits. question arrives who's next wit nupur? its bagga or arnab. nupur votes for bagga. &dats how i become fashion show incharge. reason being anti nupur prospects of mohit rathod. but wat followed was worse for dis guys going against girls. i go &join hands wit d girls. situation heated up. amit singh sittin& watchin d show. dis guy is a great unique friend of mine. sometimes he saves my ass& sometimes, he takes it puts it on barbwire.

for me was all about d bare chest round. dis round was nowhere dis time. d fights at bio chem dept. anupama turnin up watch practice& we got no formations. we watch shefali exceling out. wat we didn't know was her ongoing rift wit d guys.
anyway. all is well dat ends well.

bridal round show every year. dis year it was d most glamorous one.
filmy round was d innovativ one. thanx to nupur for her ideas. she always said rite from d very ich meetin- "we need somethin new" & dat was it. why i walked in2 it. hey i was d aamir khan ghajini. another chance of body show for me.
heaven hell round. it should hav been black &white round. bare chests took dis round to its peak. d longest round with 23people.
our all rounds were colourful. bridals- 16people wit 10tracks. filmy- 21people wit 8tracks. heaven hell- 23people wit 8tracks.
as far as d others were concerned, blue round- audience got pissed of watchin same people for 15mints. formations worked wonders. elements round- audience wonderin wat hell element is, same track got people pissed. east meets west left audience wondering where is east, where is west. warriors was just a fancy dress competition made wit d glue to paint d girls' face green. all assholes filled in dem.
khadi round- i was d scapegoat got by anupama to make dis round. though it made. good formation by shefali again. d evening dis round was made, nupur had accident at wardha. so she couldn't turn up. vinit won't bcoz of his shefali fight. when i was making, i should hav walked in it again. should hav taken dat advantage.

our gathering could have possibly led 2persons comit suicide, had they seen it.
1. michael jackson[had he been alive] after watching yogi dance.
2. gerard butler after seeing tiwari becoming a spartan

whole gathering dis time, i didn't fine space to watch it.
1st day- get every1 for khadi round. den for bridals. den off for chicken.
2nd day- started wit filmy. i remember i over drenched my hair wit gel which spoiled my pant. my enterance always made d best hooting. den off for gym. amit called up- "its time"
& we rushed. supratim, mahesh, ramesh baghel. all bare chests prepared to hit d stage. total oiling. oils dipping from everywhere. still more oil. den backstage pumps. heaven part done. enter hell. sridhar tells me my underwear is visible. i say let b. should hav bought jockey.

my turn. i knew d crowd wil overwhelm me. as expected.

however it wasn't like last year when we could clearly hear 'rambo. rambo' from stage only. blunders were made by girish sridhar aniket. yet it was d best.
my 3rd enterance was on d triple h track- time to play game. d surprise hit d audience wit d act spillin water over d body &den walk over, a double biceps shot. again &again. it was typical rambo style. a thing which mohit tried to make fun on 1st day in his mimicry. so wat. there is only guy to put up muscular poses. no1 else got dat much guts.
it was thereafter mehndale sir shoutin at me psm viva- "beta, we know u love to do gym& its a good thing. but take care of studies too"
he was rite.

post gathering. ankur goes mad for vibha. i was sad lookin at end of my bare chest era. stil workin on plan of show up at 08gatherin. baghel worked wonders. supratim got branded.
it was allover superb.
why its called show off. it reminded me of teachin d formations &d girls makin fun of me- "arnab, aage jaake show off karna mat bhoolna" & i was like- "paas mat aana, warna tel laga dunga".

Friday, May 7, 2010

Over The Top



India lost to australia. there was silence at d tv room last nite. otherwise any1 can easily make out wit howling wave wit every six [like those of yuvraj singh], dat india is gonna win. last nite it was Warner Watson.
Yesterday i met danquil. steve's 09junior. d guy had shaved off head. probably bcoz of summer. i remember his palm. hard as stone. d arm wrestling match. he was d last man standing to meet me in finals. it was a wonderful nite. patil arranged d whole stuff just for me. whole time he would keep saying- "dekh rambo, tere liye arrange kiya hoon. haar gaya to soch lena."
Announcement was done in day time. but no1 turned up. after dinner, patil- "dekhte hai. filhaal to koi aya nhi. nhi ayega to tujhe undisputed champion bana denge." i had only 1fear. ankush. heavy & a tough guy. but dis guy was busy at art gallery dat nite. thanx to Lord.
D tables were set. amit came wit arrangin everythin. &d crowd gathered from nowhere all of a sudden.
Few minutes ago, there was no1. &now there 26 guys ready to put up d fight.
It started wit baghel v/s vruj. we expected d raw punjabi power. but it was a showdown fr baghel. d senior won easily. following were others. amit came up against kane. though kane forfeited making way to d senior.
it was appearing dat d nite was of seniors only. kawalkar beat another junior. Taak went down fighting. Den came d psychokiller. Rahul. Known for his unexpected instincts. d way he took out his 1st match left every1s jaw dropped.
den...
Its me yaar...
Welcome John Rambo. Arnab v/s satendar. dis bihari fellow is from 1st yr. no doubt he was gonna loose. &it started.
whoa..
d guy gave me lock. dat was bad. i was all sweaty why wasn't his hand goin down. but managed to get him disqualified. later ms turned up sayin locks wil b disqualified. dat was a good decision.
2nd round paved in. i was up against nishant. dat was only guy whom i gav a clean chit. kawalkar walked a wayt forward to loose in 3rd round. amit won 2nd to meet danquil in 3rd round. remember amit's expression- "abe saalo, ye kise le aaye. ye haath hai ki pathar. abe haath halka kar." til d time he was shoutin, d match was over danquil was ready fr final go, where he met sunny, d guy who defeated rahul. same was here. sunny stood astonished at d junior. all juniors singin- "danquil. danquil." d shillong power was on.
where did i reach?
i was pitted against.
ram. dis guy once defeated me in a room fight. so i knew of d probabilities of dis match. it was d best of 3. d winner faces danquil in finals.
i was total silence. 1st go. very tough. d way ram took down my hand. i wasn't going for disqualification. it was either resistance or loss.
d whole crowd stood in silence. earlier it was like a wild hen fight. every1 betting &shouting. wat happened now? i could clearly hear d whisperings- "abe rambo haar gaya..."
"tension mat lo. abhi bhi 2 aur hai." there comes amit to assess d fight. it was apparent d guy was in to help me.
d 2nd go. there was huge confusion in d air. who is applying d power before time. patil goes mad- "kya ho rha hai be?" ms trying to cool down every1. &amit. quarreling wit ram.
wat was i doin? mean time i was just sitting &trying to assess how to defeat dis guy. there has to b a way out. he can't b stronger dan me. i am not going out. come baby...
dis time it was me. i took d advantage of applying power before hand. &there goes down ram. d whole crowd back to their feet. den comes 3rd go. ram was prepared. i knew his weakness. welcome home, boss.

ram was totally on it. he was done. his face was saying dat. just a bit more. &he will totally out of his stamina. dat was my strategy. it wasn't easy to take him down dis time. coz both started 2gether. so it was d stamina counting.
1st gear- 1st hand force. done. no use
2nd gear- full concentration on fists. done. no use
3rd gear- go out shaking. take control over opponent's fist. done. again no use
4th gear- breath after breath. pave full life into it. i did.
5th gear- stay on it. wait for the opponent to pass out. & it worked
& lo...... there goes out ram. disqualification. again. he couldn't hold it up for long& went out of d line.

a great breath of relief for me. dis match took d hell out of me. dis was supposed to b d final match.

juniors shouting- "sir, kal gym karne ki koi jarurat nahi. aaraam karo." surely. my shoulder was gone. supraspinatus was paining as hell. i had 1more match to go. where is danquil? same was d story for danquil. sunny left him limping. we needed time out.

patil whisteled. some1 asked- "abe ye match kal rakhte hai." i said no. i had stamina.& i needed to take d advantage of dat. danquil was in pain. i will take dat advantage.
&d match started. amit once again. dis time quarreling wit danquil- "abe saale. haath dhila chor. samajh nahi aati kya tujhe." danquil was a easy1. best of 3. 2 were just enough for me to take him out.
& its was as expected. 1st match was a total takeover. &2nd showed disqualification for danquil.
he didn't have much left. steve turned in- "wat happened to my junior?" danquil- "he has dis big thick arms. how do u expect me to defeat him."
he was right. d champ was here.

earlier dat nite, me &taak searching for sponsors allover wardha. it was 8:30pm.
"hey. listen up. i need to go."
"for wat? we havn't got any sponsors yet."
"hey. i got my match tonite. i need to eat &get ready."
"wat match now? i thought they were all over."
"no. dis one is still left. its arm wrestling."
"okay. definitely u wil win. all d best."
dat was ankita.
thanx i could make it. i was just on d verge

Debts


Debts were the serious problems i knew i was going to face while entering d 6th semester.
Rite after the completion of the 5th sem exams, i went home& all d way i was makin up my mind how to cope wit coming debts.
just like dat, i was ready to walk into d very problem bankruptcy.
it was normal in a situation where ur dad is ready to offer u money but u want spend even more on something u can reason wit ur parents.



Well. parents know everythin about me. dat dey can't straighten me up, if don't want to.
Same was here.
But didn't guess it would b more dan 10,000 bucks.
Wat???
I m talkin of bodybuilding supplements.
Ya. it was almost more dan 10,000 in 8months.
Coz i never wondered how much it cost. i went crazy about why weren't my biceps bulging out.
1 sack of 1kg optimum protein powder would cost 800bucks. alongwit creatinine costing 600 bucks for half kg. glutamine was also there. though it was in variables. and creatinine. i couldn't even finish its 1sack bcoz of its side effects.

Alongwith were internet expenses.
& ya. d trips. chikaldhara &pench.

Wat more accompanied these expenditures were...
Not were.
It was.
It was d craze for bare chest round at fashion show.
It was just for dat i took to swimming. though it was going out of my budget.
And den being d fashion show incharge, spend more. get d stuffs for juniors. ofcourse for me was nothing. for myself just a jeans pant, expenditure over waxing, gel& body oils. done. no tattoos dis time. but it wasn't Dat much. nupur came up wit d plan of aamir khan of guzarish. and d hell round. a black jeans and red shirt.
And d cultural in charge hasn't given me d money yet.
Den came d post gathering parties. and the reid& taylor blazer At nagpur. all just for the show of purpose.

And dats how i go into a debt of a...............
Wait......
Let me count...........
Its a handsome amount of 8000 bucks.

Surely it doesn't matter if u go into debt of friends' money. So dat is d consolation point.\
Rest how i wil b able to make up, depends.
Back at home, parents surely made a guess at where all d money went after staring at me when i took off my t-shirt.

Thursday, May 6, 2010

its summer



exams are ahead. so no other option to go on with.
today's special. i guess its iron man2 release date.

i don't think i wil get to watch it either. missed housefull too.
exam times are always a high time.

came back from home a day before. went jabalpur thinking of spending the whole pl at home studying. but didn't happen so. coz. loadshedding, mosquito menace.
thing i miss d most- food at home & tv.
somethin in which d hostel life excels of all is dat it gives u freedom and privacy, d most. apart from d dirty mess food, we enjoy dis part d most.
apart from dat. its d laptop, gym, internet and full bass blasting altec lansing woofers.
dats wat makes life special out of dis bullshit sevagram.

nothing else. guess sanidhya is going home tomorrow. he called me to meet him at wardha station. but i don't think it will b feasible.
ankush called me up to nagpur to accompany him to watch iron man2 there. don't think dat wil b feasible either.
in dis hot season, its better to stay indoors only.
even d wardha theatres aren't of any good.
they made big cinemas here, dat also bullshit. u hav 2puff &fan urself whole time rather dan enjoyin d movie. earlier it was worse. heard of a woman raped rite here 5yrs back. i watched 'Casino Royale' here 4yrs back sittin alone in d balcony.
d others talkies are like, wat to say, a general compartment of a passenger train running from nagpur to bilaspur at summer noon is better dan dem.
durga talkies. i remember, we went to watch 'apne'. we were waitin outside &could feel d vibrations of cooler chambers made of tin, wit every blow of sunny deol durin d movie. it was like, dhishoom& tini tini tin...
ganesh talkies is worst of all. i heard dey showed 'Dark Knight' in reverse order. 2nd half 1st, den 1st half after interval.
don't get astonished...
just think of it...
its sevagram. dey call it holy land of gandhiji