Black

The Black Album. Metallica. Was the band's best sold album.
First time I had heard of Metallica was from cousin brother Shantanu. Back then he had made his way to IIT Powai. I was still struggling to make my way to medical college. He had recommended me to listen to it. Later when I reached college, I lent my ears to Metallica from Stephenson Pohlong. That was the year of 2006. 'A' block at JNBH, MGIMS, sevagram.

The song Nothing Else Matters used to remain in my list of most played songs on my mobile, in the year of 2007, when I had suffered a 6 months back after failing in Anatomy. That was a time when I was made way to Metal songs. I remember India creating rattles in 2007 T20 World Cup. I would feel very ticklish to make way to a crowded TV hall of JNBH to watch any match. Those roars of each sixes hit by Yuvraj Singh, would lurch my heart to join the crowd, but I wouldn't.

I was pulled to TV hall by my batchmates only later. I remember watching Joginder sharma bowling the last delivery, Misbah Ul Haq scooping it to Sreeshant. And the JNBH tv hall went mad.
Same was during 2011, we had missed the Dhoni six cause someone stepped over the plug on floor in a packed tv hall, and the screen went off power.

I guess I switched on to Nothing Else Matters after a long time. Not that "I switched". Better it be "I COULD switch". That shall be a more appropriate line. It needs a proper occasion for a proper song.  

One positive report, although it was a false one, led me to go back to aeon of bummer. For one evening only though, yet I found my way back to the Black Album.

JNBH days were different. Room was full of posters. Had Altec Lansing speakers. Guess I did almost everything at college, except studying. Wish I had studied back then. Maybe had I studied well back then, I would not be here at Shillong now, doing Covid duties. haha.

I have done Covid duty only once till now. When Rymbai sir was brought in Nazareth. I still remember that evening. The first message that flashed on mobile was from Tariang sir stating they are shifting Teibor to Nazareth because of breathlessness. He was the second victim of covid who had turned critical. Otherwise in Meghalaya, then he was the eighth person who had covid. We had heard of only Sailo sir succumbing to the disease, we did not want same fate for him.

I did not sleep that night, packed up my bags early morning, set out for the novel. My ally Dr Diam had taken charge of Rymbai sir for the night. I just wanted to see him as soon as possible. When I entered the Covid HDU and saw him across the glass pane, I really wondered 'Is that him'. His first words were "I am ready to accept whatever comes." After spending the first evening with him in covid HDU, when I joined Diam and the devout, altruistic nurses for dinner, I told Diam "he does not look good." The one line of Diam hit the chord "We can't afford to lose another healthcare worker. this is just the starting. It will go as a very depressing message to the society. Keep everything ready for him."

From then, we did make progress. Under the navigation of Dr Debu, we cruised well and could accompany Rymbai sir for corona care stay after hospital discharge. That was the second quarantine for me. Rymbai sir was never marked as covid case by government citing they never found the virus in his samples. After the repeated Rt PCR were turning negative, we turned to H1N1, that also was turned out via our Flu Panel. In the end the repeated antibodies gave us a shoulder to rest on that we actually had managed a covid case well. Thanks to Civil hospital for doing atleast one good thing, doing the Ct scan for him. Seriously, just with one case I could come up to write a blog. I wonder for our dear mates, managing dozens of comorbid covid cases everyday, spending 8 hours in PPE straight at a temperature of 40 F, that also the Mumbai humidity. No lavish quarantine like us. No sight of when it will end and how it will end. 

I had a nice time with Rymbai sir. I remember the corona care ward boy taking Rymbai sir for climbing two sets of stairs while I was busy in arguing with authorities to arrange for wheel chair. By the time when I reached up, I found him lying on bed, breathless again. Every now and then I would have to explain the dyspnoea grading and reasons for his breathlessness to the authorities there over phone. Rymbai sir scolding another ward boy why he was so shit scared of us. I had dropped my guards when Rymbai sir was ready for discharge. Often he would tell me to maintain safety. I would say I am waiting for second call for covid duty. Even Diam is still waiting for it. Honestly there is always a big difference between a volunteer and a person forced to take care of a covid patient. I really missed Diam after he left for quarantine. Lets see what comes for us in coming months.

One of Rymbai sir patients had literally made his way into Nazareth covid HDU, faking covid symptoms, just to see his great doctor. And he was really happy after he saw Rymbai sir. Same was about a girl who had come for sample collection, she just had come to wish him good health since he used to treat her father. Some people are really very good.

I did not switch to the Black Album even then, because I did not have the woofers. Listening to Metallica on mobile speaker is like eating raw mango. Haha. 

This is the third quarantine for me. Because I had received a report saying I am positive. No contact no symptoms for my family either. A routine test. Fortunately my hospital tested me two times consecutively, same day, reporting negative. Yet I was ordered to stay for another home quarantine. The lab which gave my first report positive was closed for maintenance citing contamination and altered reporting possibilities. Government never clarified the matter. Media created havoc. Sad state of affairs.

Surely my locality was scared of me. Some of my family members too. I used to call ourselves Zombies after covid duties, how the public would react towards us. 

Staying alone, is ardent. While I was at the corona care center, in some way it was very tranquil. Dr Rymbai would often talk of priorities, in each one of our lives. Had it not been what I had chosen after I finished college, I surely would not been here today. Had I not joined Bethany, I would have never met him. He would tell about his post graduation days. I would reflect back on my biking years. Seriously travelling makes you a better person. You meet different people. In the end you realize we are all humans albeit the differences in our beliefs. 

The State is still safe compared to how the matters are in rest of India. But it was never about that. My collegemates, often recite their stories of struggle at Mumbai. It was never about if I could get infected. You can never say that Army guy in war shall not suffer injuries. At same time you cannot tell the army guy to manage a dying patient. Or tell a Doctor to play a pull shot off a Shoaib Akhtar bouncer. A health crisis has too be managed by doctors and nurses. Being infected and toiled is part of the care. Something I told Surajit after he finished his testing "we are all in this together bro." But in the end society has always caused more trouble compared to Covid. 

Most of the times its all about perception. When I had told my parents about my first report, there was a dread silence. When I told the same to my Uncle "Oh. Great. Now you will get the antibodies." When I told my parents about what the media was writing about me, they said why are they doing like this. When I told my uncle same "Now you are going to be the next Amitabh bacchan, they will ask what you did what you ate etc etc." Yes it did remind me of Peepli Live movie how the media and public behave.

Ibn Rushd — 'Ignorance leads to fear, fear leads to hatred, and hatred leads to violence. This is the equation.'

While I was at the corona care center, the Arijit Singh song 'Bandeya' had hit the chord. There is always a song for every occasion. While Rymbai sir lay on his bed in the ER 6 room, he had chosen to watch the movie Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara. A fruitful movie to watch if you make your way out of ICU. 

Well with 'Black', only one song does ring bells to me. Black by Pearl Jam. There was a time I would put this song on repeat. That was in college days, the final year. Yes, there was a Black by Sevendust. That was always in my gym playlist, even to the Iron House gym days. 

But more from the Black Album of Metallica, definitely Nothing Else Matters takes the score. Following it goes the Apocalyptica cello cover of the same. Another file, the William Joseph piano cover. But honestly all tracks from the Black Album were too good. Yes, it does match my current scene. Lets make a horrendous face. Wink please readers. Enter Covid. Sad But True i was negative. Holier than Thou, although in future if infected. You shall remain Unforgiven. Wherever I may roam, don't tread on me. Of course Nothing else matters than a dedicated medical profession. OF the layman and The Man. For the God that failed. My dear Mate of misery, how the society sees you. And the struggle within, both for the patient and the care taker.

Seriously there is nothing much to do when I sit at quarantine. Gyms got closed so many months now. The speed with which I finish movies is more than the speed of downloading. Yes. Books. surely. Badminton was swallowed by rain. Later when the rain went away,  my covid report ate my fate of getting any company. Seriously. Lets make a horrendous face. 

I shall be indebted to Dr Michael for his efforts to guard my faith in myself. Rest. When in Rome, do as the Romans do. Can't help it. Lets make a horrendous face again. 

Where there is charity and wisdom, there is neither fear nor ignorance : Francis of Assisi.

I am sure for Rishi, he still cling to reading blogs. I miss his company.